If My Ex-boyfriends Were Wines

Forget about the concept of 'terroir' and the expression of place in a wine. Have you ever had a wine that reminded you of a person? 

Associating wine and food with a living being is so strange, but beautifully reminiscent. I was sipping on a wine the other night, making note of some characteristics, and thought: "how oddly familiar" -- it was basically my ex-boyfriend, in a glass. It inspired me to think of some other partners and what they might be like, if they were wines. You know who you are.... 

The first boyfriend

The one that kind of reminds you of an old Taylor Swift song; you think you're super in love with them, but you really have no frame of reference. The one you return to time and again, because you're a creature of habit and you're comfortable with him - not because he's out of this world.

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As a wine: an old faithful. One that brings you comfort and nostalgia. For me, this is Louis Jadot Beaujolais.

The D-bag

The one you're not proud of, whose personality kind of sucks, but they serve a purpose for a while... Just what you need in the moment (desperate times), when your standards are particularly low. It's DeF NoT long-term, though.

Sorry, Yellow Tail.

Sorry, Yellow Tail.

As a wine: something quick and simple. Something you hope will leave you refreshed and satisfied, but often leaves you full of regret. A wine you could probably find in any grocery store and probably leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. 

The foreigner

The one that you feel like you've known forever, despite your different backgrounds. The one who becomes a dear friend, excites you, and brings some much needed change into your life. He lives extravagantly and is fun, but maybe not fully compatible for your long-term. 

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As a wine: a special occasion wine. Something French, perhaps ;) It makes you feel good, is playful, yet sophisticated. This wine, for me, is Champagne.

The one that got away

The elusive 'one'. Fiery passion, meets romance, meets close companionship. So perfect, even the ending is beautiful, and you wouldn't trade it in for the world. The one that sets the standard for all future relationships. 

Jolie-Laide Grenache (2o13)

Jolie-Laide Grenache (2o13)

As a wine: one that is romantic and well balanced; gets you excited but also brings you comfort. A wine that feels unforced and just is what it is. You could drink it every day without getting tired of it. For me, this would be a beautiful Grenache. 

I'm not crying... You're crying. 

I honestly never thought that I would become one of those people who compares literally everything to wine, but here we are! Let me know if you can identify at all, or if you'd choose alternate wines for each person!